I returned from one of my overseas trips and was warmly welcomed by my wife. I had a late lunch and decided to go and take some rest. My wife later informed me that dinner was on the table, and I could take it anytime I liked. Later that night, I went downstairs and found nothing on the dining table. I checked the kitchen, too, and there was no trace of any food kept anywhere. Since she was already in bed, I decided not to disturb her. More so, I wasn’t particularly hungry. By the following morning, I discovered that she brought the food upstairs and kept in my study. She reasoned that since I just returned from a trip, it could be a stress for me to go downstairs. She meant well, but we have experienced what is commonly referred to as communication gap.

At the root of most grudges or complete breakout of hostility is the unwillingness to hold a conversation where necessary…Whether in a marital context, work environment, or among neighbours; conversation remains the indispensable peace code.

This story reminds me of a public notice that I saw somewhere. It read, “Before you hold a grudge, hold a conversation. It may be a result of a misunderstanding”. At the root of most grudges or complete breakout of hostility is the unwillingness to hold a conversation where necessary. This applies to both marital relationships as well as other forms of union. Early in our International Relations class, we were taught that it is better to jaw-jaw than to war-war. Our teacher was referring to one of the quotes of British wartime Prime Minister, Sir Winston Churchill. Ironically, when people plunge themselves into needless fights, the outcome is still determined in a roundtable. Whether in a marital context, work environment, or among neighbours; conversation remains the indispensable peace code.