Displayed conspicuously in a public space is this notice: “Before you hold a grudge, hold a conversation. It may be a result of a misunderstanding”. At the root of most grudges or complete breakout of hostility is the unwillingness to hold a conversation where necessary. Imagine the case of Stella Gilbert who we referred to yesterday. She stabbed a neighbour to death over what could have been resolved with a conversation. Early in our International Relations class, we were taught that it is better to jaw-jaw than to war-war. Our teacher was referring to one of the quotes of British wartime Prime Minister, Sir Winston Churchill. Ironically, when people plunge themselves into needless fights, the outcome is still determined in a roundtable. Whether in a marital context, work environment, or among neighbours, conversation can prevent large scale trouble. It also can be one of the most powerful therapies ever known to man.
It could happen that the people we want to hold grudge against never realised that they have done anything wrong. Bringing the matter up provides an opportunity for remediation.
Jesus left us with an established protocol for resolving conflicts among brethren. He was never of the impression that because we are brethren it would be a smooth sail in our relationships all the time. In our text, an aggrieved person is to approach the offender to tell him his fault privately. It could happen that the people we want to hold grudge against never realised that they have done anything wrong. Bringing the matter up provides an opportunity for remediation. Reading further, we are taught to go the extra mile. Should the offender become incorrigible, then he must be addressed in the company of another brother. It is only if that fails as well that the matter is to be reported to the church. If we follow these recommended steps, there will be no crisis hangover among God’s people.