Jesus commanded His disciples to love one another. Besides the commandment, He also provided a template of how to go about it – it is “as I have loved you”. The New Testament was written basically in Greek from where we have the Vulgate and ultimately the English Bible. The original language has love defined at different levels with different words. The first Greek word translated love is “eros”. This is where we got the English word erotic. This describes sexual attraction between two individuals of the opposite gender. When young people claim they are in love, they are most probably speaking at this level. The problem with erotic feelings is that they do fade, and relationships built only on such a foundation are doomed to failure.

To understand the difference between phileo and agape, consider the former is directed at people we think are deserving of it; whereas the latter is for all people, including those who are undeserving… We are called to love supremely just as Jesus did.

Then you have the word phileo. This type of love is brotherly affection displayed towards people we are fond of. You find this among close relationships where one is seeking the welfare of another. While this is commendable, it falls short of the kind of love Jesus has and recommends for us. That brings us to the third Greek word used to describe love; that is, agape. Jesus loved us the agape way. This is the unconditional love of God with the price tag of Jesus’ Blood. To understand the difference between phileo and agape, consider the former is directed at people we think are deserving of it; whereas the latter is for all people, including those who are undeserving. It is in this light we understand Jesus’ commandment that we love our enemies and those who despitefully use us. You cannot attain this level with eros or phileo; it can only be by agape. We are called to love supremely just as Jesus did.